Mind Your Manners 

You’ve figured out which suit to wear (or, perhaps that wearing a suit might be inappropriate). You’re impeccably groomed, your shoes are shined, your nails are manicured, there’s not a hair out of place. With a stack of business cards in hand, you head out the door. You are going to a networking event in your field. This time it’s especially important. You’re hoping to make some contacts and move forward in your job search. Wait a minute. Check and make sure you haven’t forgotten anything. Something very very important indeed. What might that be? Well, all too often, well-dressed, well-intentioned individuals leave home and forget their manners. They actually believe that etiquette is passé and just plain old-fashioned; manners are for others and much too formal for themselves.

Hopefully you are not someone who actually believes that. Just in case, let me tell you that nothing is more important. If you want to make a strong lasting impression, keep in mind that etiquette counts. It’s not measurable, but it’s noticeable. Often the little touches are forgotten even if they were drummed into your head when you were a youngster. Refreshers and keep updated is important in the social and business aspects of your life.

There are the basic social etiquette rules, such as holding doors open for others, how and when to shake hands, learning how to make proper introductions and writing thank you notes after receiving a gift or attending a function. There are dozens of rules of etiquette for dining: placing napkins on your lap, passing the salt and pepper together (even when only one of the two is requested), which silverware to use when, which glass is yours and which is your neighbors and, the ever-popular:  keeping your elbows off the table!

There are courses to train (or retrain) executives in etiquette and classes to help international travelers learn the appropriate customs in other countries so as not to offend their hosts. 

Etiquette is the ability to make others feel comfortable in what may be an uncomfortable situation. If you see someone in an unfamiliar environment, nothing is more appreciated than helping him or her feel at home. Treating others with courtesy and respect, avoiding inappropriate behavior or behavior that might be misconstrued all falls within the bounds of proper etiquette. Everyone seems to know the definition of “The Golden Rule”, but how many actually implement it and follow something so simple as part of their everyday lifestyle? How often have you heard people complaining about someone who has arrived late for an appointment, or cut him or her off while driving, or not sending thank you notes when they themselves fall short in the very same area?

While it may seem insignificant, or even (hard to believe) “old fashioned” those who excel in the Rules of Etiquette achieve greater success in almost every aspect of their lives. People really do notice those little things. And if you fail in professional etiquette, it follows that others will perceive your competence in other areas to be weak as well. It’s a scary thought! Fortunately you have control of the situation and it’s up to you to convey the image of professionalism. And hopefully it’s contagious.